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Category: Human

Do your thing!

3 reasons why you shouldn’t listen to others — even me.

What could be more relieving than stepping out of those four walls?

Daddy this, DD that! As if the whole world is crying out the varieties of my name.

Claustrophobic is less of a word to define me.

Seriously missing those days that it’s just me, my reading table and mattress.

Many days, I find an excuse to leave home.

 

Today, I smartly take up an errand that hardly concerns me.

If you live in my situation, you will agree that I’m less smart. Most people around me believe I’m being modest by saying that, they think otherwise but I understand better.

Here’s why I said that:- I married at the age of 25 — with a large family, little salary (16k Naira) and a Bachelor’s degree. Nothing more.

Stupid right? I’m just like this guy!…

Not that the age matters a lot, I was pretty sure things will turn out to my favour.

But did it? N/Y

Both.

With 3 kids, a wife, no job and draining a bank account, you could sense what’s about to happen.

But am I scared? Again, another deep question.

N/Y.

Aside from that my landlord will come knocking at my door latest by the end of June, I’m never scared.

Even at that, the worst would be, “I don’t have the money now, I’ll pay you later.”

I’m sitting here thinking about getting home when dinner is served hot — but this loneliness is so comforting a company I don’t want to let go. This headache as a result of hunger will not allow me to stay longer.

Two things now, I didn’t regret getting married when I did. I didn’t regret quitting my job when I did too. But, I’m pretty broke and very close to bankrupt. Ultimately, I’m very happy?

The sole reason for this is that.

I did my thing — my way.

The day I announce getting married — everyone thinks I’m crazy. They like my fiance but they think she’s pregnant already. For love and respect, no one says it to my face or have the courage to ask.

Aside from that — I inform those I choose to.

I forget to inform some important people but I also cut out those that may see my invitation as asking for financial assistance.

For three years, I tried starting a side hustle but it didn’t work for me. Building it in tiny bits just didn’t work for me. Besides the investment isn’t there — for those years, I literally lived from my hand to mouth every single month. So, no space for an extra side hustles investment.

When the time ticks to say stop, I said it with a caps — STOP.

While working on the side hustle revolution. I religiously listened to Ramit Sethi, Pat Flynn and James Altucher.

Oh! Almost forgot. I’m still a citizen of the side hustle nation.

Unfortunately, many things I learnt from these great guys didn’t deliver the expected results. Mind you, the situation is subjected to human/ my errors too.

The last time I checked, none of these guys talked about you starting a side hustle when you close from work at 6 pm, then you quickly jump on the bus and sit in traffic only to get back home at 10 pm. No electricity and you’re freaky tired of typing a number on your phone, talk less of checking out the trends on Twitter. I rush to bed so that you can meet the early hours of 5 AM if you don’t want to be late at work.

The ideas and concept they preach are workable, but in my context, it’s difficult to practise. I tried, but I failed.

Good news is; I’m failing forward in the success direction.

In one of my poems, I wrote that people should never listen to books or live their lives based on people’s look about it because context matters a lot.

In everything that happens, I never regret or blame anyone for it. I’m responsible for all of my actions.

Here are 3 reasons why I do my thing — my way.

When people talk to me or advise me, I have a modicum feel that;

Is he telling the truth?

As much as I’m quick to believe, I pause and play whatever anyone says about two to three rounds before coming to a conclusion about it.

I’d even include the gestures that accompany the words.

When people advise you, all they talk about is their perception of the subject matter.

How they feel, if you understand well, has a lot to do with their background, beliefs and other psychological nudges.

A closer perspective ensues when they relate the subject matter to their personal lives, just as I’m doing right now, or rather, they tell a story of somebody that something close to the situation has happened to and find a way to match it to your situation.

The fact is, no two problems are the same. Obviously, different problems can never have similar solutions.

Therefore, the trust issue tends to set in.

However, either you’re saying the truth or not, I do my thing!

Looking for someone to blame

You need not to quote me, please. When people tell me things and I do them, I tend to blame them when things eventually go wrong.

I may not tell it to their faces, but I blame them. At least — in my mind.

Most people listen to other people’s advice or totally follow their lead in matters that relate to their personal lives because they don’t trust their own decisions and when things go wrong, they find who to hold accountable.

Lying to oneself

When things happen to you, 50% of the time, you know what to do.

Asking for other people’s advice or opinion is only to validate what we already have in mind. When they provide their thoughts about the issue and it turned out contrary to yours.

What do you do?

Do you take theirs or stick to yours?

If you take theirs without any conviction, welcome — you’ve just lied to yourself.

To crown it all, when people advice or randomly talk about any issue.

Before I make decisions off that, I examine the context.

That’s the take-home — Examine the CONTEXT.

What do you think?